Weep and Find God

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Blessed are those that weep…..For they will see the kingdom of God.

We have weeped, we have been cleansed, we have learned, we have grown, we have loved.

We have found God.

There is a deep theological discussion on whether or not the kingdom of God is what we have made here on earth, or if there is a heavenly experience waiting for us.  Deep discernment and study of Jesus’ words lends to many points of view.  Many churches and denominations feel very differently about this.  I am comfortable in the grey zone.

I believe that the Kingdom of God can be found here on earth.  It is through our thoughts, actions, deeds, and love of one another that we live as Christ to one another.  However, I am mystic enough that Jesus’ description of the coming of the Kingdom of God resonates with me on a “there is something else” level.  The “other” Kingdom of God also makes the resurrection make more sense.  As Episcopalians we pray weekly that “with the angels and archangels and all the company of heaven we sing these praises to you.”  I have a hard time believing that 2000+ years of tradition can be chalked up as collective psychosis.  There is something more.  I may not be able to describe it fully, but there is a Kingdom of God.

Whether the Kingdom of God is what we’ve made of God’s teachings here on earth, or something of the afterlife, or a bit of both, or a lot of both, I know that it is through our times of grief that we find joy.  It is through the times of weeping that gardens are watered.  It is through times of weeping that we are cleansed of our sins.  It is through our weeping that we connect to others.  And it is through weeping that we often feel closer to God.

I’ve always said that I really didn’t want the stories I have in my life.  I didn’t want the cancer, the hearing loss, the family mental illness, the pain, or the grief.  I didn’t really want the story that God gave me, but it’s hard to regret that story, when that weeping is what brought me closer to God.  I have a sure conviction of God.  I have a belief that God keeps his promises.  I believe deeply that all will be one.  God’s gift of the resurrection this Easter time is that there is a Kingdom of God, and it’s ours.

Anna Fitch Courie is an army wife, nurse, layperson, and the author of several books, including the “Christ Walk” series from Church Publishing and the Sally the Comet books from CreateSpace. Anna finds her calling where health and spirituality intersect.  Anna is a registered nurse and worked in health care for the past twenty years. More recently, she has been a consultant on building community coalitions on health. Anna is a graduate of Clemson University, the University of Wyoming, and Education for Ministry at Sewanee: the University of the South. She is currently enrolled at Ohio State University in the Doctoral in Nursing Practice program. Home is wherever the Army (and God) sends her.  You can find her blog at Christ Walk (www.christwalk40day.blogspot.com); on facebook at www.facebook.com/Christwalk40day; on twitter @christwalk1 and on Instagram @christwalk1.

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